My Best Friend, A Veteran of the Vietnam War
I will tell you the story of my very best friend, his name was Mark. He was the type of friend who comes along only once in a lifetime for most of us. He was the type of friend who accepted everyone as they were, he loved you for who you were when he met you, he never tried to change who you were or how you thought. He was the type of friend who always had your back. He would lend you money if you were having financial problems, he would lend an ear and listen to any problems you may have. He would always give good advice that came from the heart.
I met Mark after I left active duty with the Army and got assigned to a National Guard unit for a mandatory three-year term of service. Mark was my squad leader and I got to know him well. It took time and went slowly, I am not the easiest person to get to know, I mostly keep to myself. I actually never got to know him well, or hear much about his story until my first summer camp. During that first summer camp we bunked together while we were off duty and shared a tent when in the field. The time spent in the tent, talking through the night, is how I first got to know Mark and his story. We were radio operators and had to man the equipment 24/7. He would keep me company through my shift, I would keep him company through his shift. Like I said, he always had your back, and I always tried to return the favor, first out of obligation, then out of the love I came to feel for him. On these long nights he began to tell me his story. The story started unlike most military stories. We got on the subject of his military duty by me asking his age. When he told me his age he obviously saw the shocked look on my face. By looks alone I thought he was nearly twenty years older than he was. That is when he told me that he had done two tours of duty in Vietnam and that he believed that his aging was due to the stress of the war and exposure to agent orange. I never pressed him to tell me anything, I just felt that was not the right thing to do to any veteran, especially one I was growing so fond of. Over time Mark began to give me some of the details of what he went through and what he saw during his time in Vietnam. He told me that he served with the Army for seven years total and was a door gunner on a Huey during both of his tours. He never told me what units or exactly where he served and I never pressed him for more information than he was willing to give on his own. He would get a sad and haunted look when he spoke of the war and what he had seen while he was there. He used to tell me that he was drafted for his first tour and although he was mad and scared he never thought about not serving. He volunteered for his second tour because he said had seen how people lived and were treated in Vietnam, and other countries. He felt obligated to do what he could to help them live as we live in the United States. He knew better than most how fortunate he was to live in America. He would speak about his time in Vietnam and that he was glad that as a door gunner he did not know if he ever killed anyone, he said that was one thing that made it a little easier for him. He would tell me that his job was to suppress enemy fire while picking up or dropping off troops, he did that by firing at muzzle flashes as he saw them, so he never knew if his rounds hit anyone or not. He said that he was shot down seven times over his two tours. He would tell me that evading the enemy waiting to be picked up is where he thought that he got exposed to agent orange. He used to talk about all of the time he had to hide and wait for help, you could see the fear come back into his eyes as he spoke. He always thanked God for getting him through those times. He said was sure God existed because he could not have gotten through the war without the help of God. He used to wonder why God saved him in particular. I told him that God knew that he would help many people as he had helped me. I cannot tell all the help Mark gave me, it was a tough economy in those days, it was hard to find a job in our area. I never found a job for the three years I served the Guard, my wife and I would not have made it had it not been for Mark. To this day I thank God for bringing Mark into my life. Over time Mark and I became fast friends, we did everything together until he met the love of his life. He married the woman and they moved back to Florida. We kept in close contact. Then one day I could not get Mark on his phone, no cell phones, or social media back then. For days I tried and could not get him or his wife on the phone. I thought they may be on vacation. A week later, late at night, my phone rang. It was his wife telling me Mark had passed from cancer. I was devastated. I went to his funeral, after the services I spoke with his wife. I asked why he had not told me about his situation, she said that Mark only told immediate family what was going on. She said that he did not want to worry his friends with his illness. Just exactly what I would expect from the best man I had ever known, a true hero, not just in his service to his country, but in life as well. He loved this country and he loved serving this country, but he did not love what he had to do over there. I miss my best friend, I lost him thirty years ago, and it still hurts, I still think of him every single day. |
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